Out to Lunch: The 2005 Mirage PPT Freeroll

There will be no winning of any kind

I hoped to make the final table of this, the final season-one PPT event, as my best chance to qualify for season two. My one-year card was expiring and although I had cashed in two WPT events this season I didn't think it would be enough to get me on the PPT roster for season two.

 

There were 172 entrants today and I drew table 54, seat three. Chip Jett was on my left in seat four; Chris Bigler seat five; Randy Holland seat six; Billy Baxter seat seven; media entry Linda Johnson seat eight; Max Stern seat nine; Kevin Song seat one; and JC Tran, who had knocked me out at the Doyle Brunson with Four Kings beating my Aces Full, on my right in seat two. It wasn't an easy table but it wasn't as bad as a PPT table could be.

 

I got pocket Aces three times in level one. I got no action twice and lost to Randy Holland when the board made a Straight and he had a higher Straight, bringing me down to 7550 from my starting 10,000 when they broke the table. I moved to table 38, seat eight. WPT Paris champ Surindar Sunar was on my left in seat nine; Asher Derai, seat one; Avery Cardoza, seat two; the lovely media entry Allyn Jaffrey-Shulman, Barry's wife, seat three; 2002 WSOP champ Robert Varkonyi, seat four; local entry Scott Wilson, seat five; Young Phan, seat six; and "Kamikaze Kid" Hon Le on my right in seat seven with a short stack. We barely started playing when they announced we were having a dinner break! By the time we figured out that it was a mistake, it was too late and we were stuck with an unwanted hour off 90 minutes after we had started. Somebody was out to lunch.

 

When we got back I won a few pots at my new table, chipping up to 11,550 after withstanding Varkonyi's droning trademark, "Do you want me to call? I'll let you play my hand for me. Tell me what you want me to do," and getting him to lay down whatever he had when I represented a Flush on the river. Then, a floorperson came over and asked who the big blind was. It was me! They were moving me to the Spotlight Table!

 

They wired me and put me in seat six. Mel Judah was on my left in seat seven; "Miami" John Cernuto, seat eight; Ron Faltinsky, seat nine; 1991 WSOP champ Brad Dougherty, seat one; "Syracuse" John Tsiprailidis, seat two; Susie Isaacs, seat three, a media entry named Trey (like Bill Gates, who shared the nickname, he was "the third"), seat four, and Farzad "Freddy" Bonyadi, seat five. It folded to me on the small blind and I raised with pocket Nines. Mel reraised me, indicating a pair or a big Ace. I decided to call and see a flop. It came Ace high and I brilliantly check-folded. That was it for the featured table; they moved us en bloc back to a regular one.

 

Barry "Spock" Greenstein came into seat eight when Miami John busted. After the Nines incident I was back down to 7575 at the break. Farzad busted and none other than Vince Van Patten took seat five. It folded to me in late position and I raised with Ace-Ten of Diamonds. Brad Dougherty on the big blind reraised me almost all in. He had recently done the same to Barry Greenstein, who folded. I was getting three-to-two on the call and decided to risk it so I put my chips in. He turned up pocket Queens. I flopped an Ace and had reason to hope but he made a runner-runner Straight to bust me. I finished 95^th out of 172.

 

Matt "Jacks Up" Matros busted around the same time and we had a quiet, wound-licking dinner at a local steakhouse. They didn't have any great wines but the Ducale Reserve Chianti was always serviceable.

 

I was home for a bit to nest with Shortstack. Next big event: the Mirage WPT, inaugural event of season four. I had been playing poker for almost two years and felt like I was ready to turn the corner. Would season four be the Season of the Lion?

 

Tahoe ahoy: The 2005 Harvey's Lake Tahoe WSOP Circuit

Tilting in Tahoe

I flew into Reno the night before and drove the Hertz rental up to Tahoe in time to make the Full Tilt dinner at Friday's Station atop Harrah's, where the other Full Tilt pros and I met our satellite winners for the event, including Josh "Professor Plum" Prager and his lovely wife Helen. I snagged Howard "Bub" Lederer (The Professor) to sit next to me since he had been so busy I had barely had two words with him in the last year. He and I liked the same kind of wine and he introduced me to the 2001 Duckhorn Paraduxx, a yummy Zinfandel-Cabernet blend from the esteemed Napa winery. Former support god JDN, now in charge of Full Tilt special events, paid the bill and we all rested up for the main event tomorrow.

Sfzp

I plunked down ten dimes at Harvey's Lake Tahoe to register for the next-to-last WSOP Circuit event and try to qualify for the Tournament of Champions freeroll. Since Harrah's was adding roughly $400,000 to each of these events in the form of entries to that freeroll they decided to eliminate one of the only two comps poker players got: the free buffet. Complimentary drinks were still available while playing so I made sure I took them for several bottles of water. I drew table 46, seat four. Frequent RGP poster Oliver Tse, a satellite winner, was on my left in seat five. Gabriel Thaler, a tough pro, had seat six. Marc Aubin, with whom I had played two years ago in Aruba, had seat seven. Doug Lee of Calgary, winner of the Rio WSOP Circuit event, had seat eight. A player Tony, unknown to me and sporting a pony tail, had seat nine. Seat 10 was The Man: 2004 Player of the Year Daniel Negreanu, the hottest thing in poker. In seat one was Alex Prendes, with whom I had briefly played in Reno; seat two was cash-game player Cuco Quintero, and in seat three was the aggressive, cigar-chomping, singing Amir Vahedi.

 

I tried to play pots against the players whose pictures weren't on the wall at Binion's and ended up raising early with pocket Queens and calling a reraise by Marc Aubin along with Gabe Thaler, who called my raise and then Marc's reraise.  The flop was a bingo, Queen-Seven-Six, giving me top set. It checked to Marc, who bet 2000. I check-raised to 5000 and Gabe quickly mucked. Marc thought for a long time and I put him on Aces. Finally, he moved in for the rest of his almost 10,000 and I quickly called, turning over the nuts. He did have Aces and didn't improve, cleaning him out save one black chip and doubling me to 20,025. Marc didn't last much longer and Scotty Nguyen came into seat seven. Seats one and nine busted and I had a nice 19,025 at the break.

 

Nothing worked after the break and I lost several small pots to bring me down to 8000 by the next break. Jeff Lisandro came into seat two after Cuco busted. I continued my downward spiral and had only 3000 when I reraised Daniel all in on my small blind with pocket threes. Unfortunately he had picked up Jacks and happily called. I didn't improve and I was out of the contest, finishing 105 out of 173.

 

Josh was still in the running at the dinner break and when I saw him wandering I invited him to dinner before I found out Helen had already gone home. We salvaged a little conversation at Caesars Tahoe's steakhouse but as he was still playing he didn't try any of the yummy Nickel & Nickel John C. Sullinger Cabernet, unfortunately a 2000 vintage being all they had. I changed my flight and headed back to Vegas for the next event: the final Professional Poker Tour freeroll, at the Mirage.

 

Champing for a bit: The 2005 WPT Championship at Bellagio

Not this year

I had already bought into the $25,500 World Poker Tour Championship, a tournament that set the world record for juice at a whopping $1250, so that I could get into the celebrity freeroll at the Commerce and get some value for my juice. I had half-expected that with that enormous rake the Bellagio would surprise us with some nice gift or comp but as usual the only comp forthcoming without begging was the $15 buffet discount and the full comp to the dinner buffet for those still in the event. I totaled up the juice I had paid over the last not-quite-two years at Bellagio: $11,665. I hoped the growing competition among poker rooms would sweeten the deal a little bit for the tournament players.

 

I entered both of the $2600 super satellites, playing for cash since I had the entry, but got nowhere in either and settled instead for some nice dinners at Ah Sin and Les Artistes steakhouse across the street at Paris. At Artistes, Shortstack and I had been drinking the 2000 Ch. Branaire, a moderately priced Bordeaux from what was of course one of the best years in history. I couldn't get away from the bone-in Filet there, a fabulous dish at what would be the best restaurant in town most places but here in the capital of world cuisine just another hotel steakhouse. At Ah Sin we dined with Russell Rosenblum and Matt "Jacks Up" Matros, whose excellent book The Making of a Poker Player I was about halfway through, and feasted on soup, sushi, satays, and stir-fry. Their wine list wasn't terribly exotic but the 2001 Mondavi Napa Cabernet Sauvignon was expectedly yummy, a great year for an extremely reliable classic.

 

Bellagio had broken the 452 entrants in the Championship into two flights for day one and I had drawn the second flight so I had the day off while most of the TV pros played, which was fine with me. When my day arrived I drew table 44, seat four. Shortstack said that was great because I'd already flopped a set. I wasn't unhappy with my table but the toughest players were lined up like a rogue's gallery on my left: Swedish pro Ken Lennard in seat five, Jan "Le Grande" Boubli in seat six, "Magic" Antonio Esfandiari in seat seven, and my pal Chad Layne, a very tough and smart player who made several final tables in the Ultimate Poker Challenge at the Plaza, in seat eight That was a difficult lineup to get frisky with. Seats nine and 10 were players I didn't know: David Sutcliffe and Richard C. Roberts. In seat one was Shahram Sheikram; seat two, Ram "Crazy Horse" Vaswani, a tough and potentially wild player, and on my right was WSOP champ and author Tom McEvoy, an old-school player who not only played by the book but also wrote it.

 

I had my work cut out for me.

 

Ken Lennard and Jan Boubli were making plenty of moves on pots but Antonio was playing as tight as a drum. I hovered around my 50,000 starting stack, going to the first break with 48,100 and the second with 52,475. Richard C. Roberts in seat 10 was getting hit with the deck and taking plenty of chips from the aggressive players on his right. I lost several small pots, and then finally I defended my big blind against a button raise from Ram with Four-Trey of Diamonds. The Flop came Jack-Eight-Deuce with two diamonds and I decided to check-raise him and try to pick up the pot right there. He called and the turn was the Five of Clubs, giving me an open-ended Straight draw as well. I bet out and he called. The river was the Ace of Diamonds, giving me both a Straight and a Flush. I decided to check it and induce a bluff but Crazy Horse didn't get crazy and checked behind me. I showed the Flush and he mucked. I was back up to 43,125 at the next break.

 

I struggled and lost a couple pots and was down to 30,350 at the end of level four. The Swede Ken Lennard busted out and was replaced by the Dane Mads Andersen, whose Aces I had cracked on a suckout in Tunica. All of a sudden Antonio shifted gears and started raising every pot. I looked for something to play back at him with and settled for calling on the button with Ten-Nine offsuit. I check-raised him on a Nine-high flop and he studied me for a couple minutes, trying to get me to talk to him, then tossed in 25,000, putting me almost all in. I studied him and decided he probably had me beat, especially since the last time he had tried that move on me I had called him with top pair and busted him. I mucked and he showed Ace-Ten offsuit for what would have been a three-outer. I outsmarted myself on that play, giving Antonio too much credit, and should have called. But I still had 20,000 and, as Phil Hellmuth, Jr., would say, I was in! In! In!

 

Soon thereafter, Antonio raised yet again and McEvoy called on the button. I found pocket Sixes in the small blind and pushed in, thinking I probably had the best hand. Antonio immediately folded but McEvoy, to my surprise, called with pocket Fives. Unfortunately, the board came all Hearts and McEvoy's Five of Hearts played, sending me out of the contest with 171 remaining in flight two.

 

Russell and Matt busted out soon thereafter, as did my buddy Andy "The Rock" Bloch. Russell and Matt, best friends, had both made the final table last year and hoped to repeat but it was not to be. Matt sequestered himself to decompress but Russell, Andy, his girlfriend Jen, and I had a yummy dinner at Elements at the Aladdin, washed down with the wonderful 1989 Ch. Pichon-Baron. Shortstack had taken an earlier flight home so I called Alaska to change my flight so I could join her. She picked me up in Lioncar, the silver Sebring convertible, and we settled in for some time off before the next big event at one of our favorite places, Lake Tahoe.

 

Pppppppt: The 2005 Bellagio PPT

Busted Bub

My initial excitement over the "tour" aspect of the World Poker Tour had faded and at this point I was happiest to go back to Las Vegas, where the streets were lined with world-class resorts, restaurants, and casinos. Bellagio was not my favorite place to play because of the constant cigarette smoke drifting into the supposedly non-smoking poker area. Nice hotel though.

 

As always the Professional Poker Tour event was a freeroll, meaning I didn't have to pay, and I donned a polo shirt bearing the logo of my sponsor, Full Tilt Poker, before heading over to the B. There were 230 entrants. I drew table 41, seat three, and as usual for these events had a table full of good players. On my left in seat four was John Stolzman, the young gun who won the WPT event in Tunica and caused a tempest in a teapot when he tipped the staff an extra $500 over the $45,000 "tip" he was forced to leave when 3% was deducted from the prize pool. (Even this freeroll event, nominally a $500,000 purse, really paid only $485,000, the other $15,000 going to the tournament staff.) Seat five was the tough John Myung. On his left was Chris Bigler, another tough and aggressive player. Seat seven was my buddy Russell Rosenblum, and in seat eight was Ken Goldstein, brother of Stan. The Professor himself, Howard "Bub" Lederer, had seat nine. In seat one was Lyle Berman, majority owner of the WPT and PPT. I asked him why a guy who flipped burgers at McDonalds couldn't play a scratch-card game in his restaurant but it was OK for the guy who owned this tournament to play in it. "Because I'm dead money," he replied. Finally, on my right was Ron Faltinsky, a tournament veteran.

 

I tangled it up with Howard early when he raised in late position and I called on the button with Queen-Ten of Diamonds. The flop came Nine-Eight-Trey with the Nine and Eight of Diamonds, giving me a Straight Flush draw. Howard bet out and I made a modest raise. He came over the top, again modestly. I put him on a big pair and I moved all in. Howard thought for a while, gave me his patented staredown, and then said, "Oh well, I have a lot of work to do today," and called all in. I had him covered since he had lost a small pot earlier. He turned over the expected Aces and I'm sure he was happy to see I had the big draw, making him a slight favorite, and not a set, which would have made him a seven-to-one dog. The turn gave me a flush and the river made my Straight Flush. I had busted Bub and, classy guy that he was, he gave a tight smile, wished me luck, and lumbered out of the room. I was up to 17,325.

 

My old nemesis Phil Hellmuth, Jr., took Howard's seat and immediately ordered several bottles of Dom Perignon from the cocktail waitress, although he didn't drink them. As was my tradition, I asked Phil if he knew my name yet. He looked annoyed, like a fly was buzzing around his head, and barely shook his head. A few others at the table said, "Really?" and "You don't know who he is?" I told Phil we'd probably played almost 40 hours of poker together and flipped him a Lion Tales card. Finally he remembered Aruba. "You're the guy who came over the top of me with Ace-Eight in Aruba and beat my pocket Tens!"

 

I said, "I had Ace-Ten and you had pocket Nines, but yeah. You talked about it for three hours."

 

"But there was only an hour left in the day," he said.

 

"Actually it was the last hand of the day. I came back a couple hours later and you were still talking."

 

He wrinkled his nose and clammed up.

 

Ron Faltinsky got moved to the spotlight table and then Ram "Crazy Horse" Vaswani took his seat. I had 17,600 at the first break. John Stolzman busted and Phi Nguyen took his spot on my left. I wasn't too happy about that as Phi was a very tough player. Nevertheless, I chipped up with a couple small pots to 22,000 at the next break.

 

Tony Cousineau took seat two when Ram busted and then the winner of the Party Poker Million last month, Mike Gracz, took seat seven when Russell lost all his chips. I played a few pots but got raised out by the aggressive guys on my left and was down to 13,350 at the break. Then Ken Goldstein slow-played a flopped set of Aces and got some chips when I tried to pick up the pot on the river. Mike Gracz busted and was replaced by a guy I didn't recognize, sipping a cocktail, who said his name was John. I figured he was a high roller put in by the Bellagio but when the President of Bellagio, Bill McBeath, came up and stood behind him, I got suspicious. It turned out Bellagio and used at least some of its entry slots for hotel executives rather than as rewards for loyal customers, as every other PPT host casino had done. John turned out to be a finance bigwig at Bellagio and a very nice guy. Bellagio's management were in the enviable position of not having to try very hard to attract customers or earn their loyalty. It would be fun to see how they adjusted when they were no longer the premier destination in town.

 

Chris Bigler went out and the man himself, Doyle "Texas Dolly" Brunson, took seat six. I remarked to Doyle that the last time he was at my table I got knocked out with Aces Full to Four Kings and I blamed him. He had heard it all over the years and just smiled. But then, down to 7000 or so, I raised in second position with Ace-King. Kenny G moved all in over the top and I called. He showed Ace-Queen, making me a big favorite, but turned a Queen and I was out of the contest.

 

The $25,500 WPT Championship was next.

 

Conrad's House of Elk: The 2005 Reno World Poker Challenge

Game

Shortstack wouldn't miss a trip to the Reno Hilton, which she calls "Conrad's House of Elk" after the delicious game meat entrée served in the steakhouse there. She actually went down a day early to play in the ladies' event while I recovered from the Party cruise and I joined her the next day. Shortstack outlasted about half the field but got few playable hands and the fast structure chewed her up. I ended up flying down with Lee Markholt, also a Washingtonian, who finished second to James van Alstyne in that Poker Royale thing they played at the Orleans last year and televised on the Game Show Network. I signed up for tomorrow's main event and then we had dinner with Matt "Jacks Up" Matros, author of the hot new poker book The Making of a Poker Player. We washed the generous portion of elk down with a 1999 Stag's Leap Cask 23, always fabulous.

 

That thing

I drew table 39, seat two, to start the $5100 event, the smallest buy-in on the World Poker Tour. There were 361 starters and no one I recognized was at my table, which was great, although I later found out that seat five was occupied by Alex Prendes, who had recently made a major final table. Shortly after the start, James van Alstyne sat down fashionably late on my right in seat one. He had been on my left with a huge chip stack at the Bellagio $15,000 event and I much preferred him on my right, where I had position on him. When I had first met him at Bellagio I tried to figure out who he was and then it clicked. "You're the guy who won that thing," I had said. The Stanford grad turned his sharp eyes toward me, expressionless, and said, "Yeah, I won the thing." Someone else at the table piped up, "What did you get for winning the thing?" James replied, without missing a beat, "Some stuff."

 

The table was full of what are known as "calling stations," players who don't fold marginal hands. James tested a few of them unsuccessfully and bluffed off most of his chips while I sat back and waited for hands, which weren't forthcoming. I was down to 7675 at the first break and hovered around that level as the blinds and antes increased and the table got tougher and tougher. Seat six busted and was replaced by Richard "Got Milk" Grijalva, finalist at the 2004 WPT Championship. James couldn't make anything happen with his short stack and busted out, to be replaced by the dreaded Phil Ivey, who immediately started raising 50% of the pots. That wasn't so bad for me but I needed a decent hand to play back at him with. I decided to see a flop on the button with King-Queen offsuit but mucked it to Ivey's bet when an Ace hit and my cards didn't. Rich Grijalva busted and my buddy Andy "The Rock" Bloch, looking mean in his Full Tilt sunglasses, took seat six. I was practically down to the felt and when the button open-limped and Ivey completed the small blind, I found pocket Nines on the big and moved in the rest of my chips. The button called, Ivey folded, and to my surprise the button turned over pocket Kings. I would have called had he raised anyway but I thought it was a weird play. I didn't improve and I was out of the contest, finishing 261^st.

 

I headed to the high-limit slot room to play a little video poker and the bust-outs dribbled in behind me: John "JJ" Juanda, Allen Kessler, and finally Josh Arieh. I got no love from the machines and the elk was calling so I went for another round with Avi "Two Cokes" Freedman, this time accompanied by the 2001 Caymus Special Selection, yummy out of the bottle but deep and lush after 45 minutes or so.

 

Next stop: Bellagio. Civilization. Ahh.

 

Cruising for Cash: The 2005 Party Poker Million WPT Cruise

Some party

Way back in September I had won an entry into the Party Poker Million cruise through an on-line satellite so I went on the cruise rather than the WSOP Circuit event at the Rio that conflicted with it. Shortstack had a conflict as well and sent me off alone so I dusted off my sandy ego and booked an Alaska Airlines flight down to San Diego. This year's cruise was on a newer Holland America ship, the Öosterdam. The décor was nicer throughout than on last year's Ryndam, but they still had outrageous charges for Internet access: $0.50/min. in the cabin or $100 for 250 minutes using wireless access in the public areas. Royal Caribbean had several years ago gone to $100 for in-cabin access for the entire cruise. PartyPoker, a company that makes its money off people getting to them via the Internet, might at least have cut a deal if not comped the whole thing. I ended up spending $600 on Internet.

 

PartyPoker held a reception on the first evening with complimentary cheap wine by the glass. I looked for the usual complimentary martinis but didn't find any. CardPlayer Cruises boss Linda Johnson explained that we were to tip the dealers in the cash games on board because they weren't actually getting paid anything out of the $4/pot rake. She also mentioned that they were tacking on a mandatory $70/person service charge onto all of our bills, just because. With the exception of tea and coffee, all the drinks in the poker room and restaurant were extra. Some party.

 

I wondered what kind of financial troubles PartyPoker must be in to nickel-and-dime their best customers this way so I did some calculations. With 735 entrants plus eight no-shows, PartyPoker was collecting  $594,392 in juice (including 3% in lieu of staff tips but not including another $2100 per winner subtracted from the prize pool to pay for the cruise, surely more than the actual cost). But wait: that's not all! Sixty players entered the on-line semifinals for each cruise winner and each paid $16 in juice for a total of $960 per winner. If they started from a smaller sub-satellite they paid even more. Subtracting the 80 or so direct buy-ins, that's another $636,480! So not even counting the advertising value of this event, Party started the week ahead over $1.2 million. It was as if the couple next door had won the lottery and invited all their neighbors to a party but asked them to bring their own drinks and charged them for parking. I did get some logoed T-shirts and polo shirts but no nice denim shirt like last year – the cutbacks – and a couple of logoed beach towels I left on the ship.

 

Chicken man

I shrugged off my opinion of PartyPoker and decided to have a good time on the cruise. On board I ran into Gary "Benji" Lent and he attempted to teach me some limit Hold 'Em skills in time for the event. I had drawn day one of the two-day split start, table 14, seat four. I didn't recognize anyone at my table but seat one was a guy in a chicken suit who was wearing it on a bet. It was tough to get a read on him and the tournament directors finally made him take it off but his friends said he won the bet anyway. I started off rough, getting pocket Tens and Queens beat, but then made a Straight while defending my blind with Six-Trey offsuit. I went to the first break down slightly from the starting 10,000 at 9125.

 

From there I caught a rush, winning several small pots – well, you can't win that large a pot in limit – and got to 19,050 at the next break and then to 31,000 at the next. I busted chicken man, getting him all in preflop with my Ace-King of Spades versus his pocket Eights and flopping a King. My friend Gavin Griffin took seat nine toward the end of the day and I avoided him. I got to a high of 39.050 and finished the day with a nice 34,000.

 

The tournament ended at a reasonable hour so Benji and I went to dinner in the main dining room, where we were joined by tournament regular Dan Heimiller and a blonde 22-year-old lesbian tattooed stripper from Oregon. The tattoos were visible all along her left arm and she cheerfully told us, alternating between sipping a Bloody Mary and a glass of cranberry juice, that they go all across her torso and down her right leg. Apparently she was sharing two cabins with five young men from Eugene and they had brought her along in hopes that she would attract other, preferably heterosexual, 22-year-old women. But while most cruises have an overabundance of unattached females, this male-dominated poker charter was slim pickings so she ended up dining with us, perhaps comfortable in the avuncular warmth of Gary's and my baldness. Gary had the Mike Sexton New York Steak and I had a nice salmon without a celebrity name attached. Like last year, they named the dishes after the event staff and stars but I thought it was a little over the top to have (I am not making this up) "Shana Hiatt Red Snapper." We washed down dinner with a bottle I had brought aboard, the 2001 Nickel & Nickel Tench Vineyards Cabernet. It was sublime. They charged us $15 for corkage.

 

Day off

The second day, like the first, was at sea. I had the day off while the second half of the field started the tournament and I played some on line at great expense. I met up with Gary and Steven "Zee" Zolotow for dinner in the main dining room where we split the second Nickel & Nickel I had brought, the 2001 Rock Cairn. This one was yummy but not as lush at the Tench. Zee wanted to meet the stripper but she was nowhere to be found. An experienced cruiser, I suggested the most likely explanation was seasickness as I didn't think she could resist Zee's shining presence (his other nickname was "The Bald Eagle" in addition to Benji's and mine. The food wasn't bad on this tub, better than last year.

Limit is for suckers

Day three of the cruise we docked at Mazatlan, where I had been many times and saw no reason to visit again if I couldn't go to Señor Frog's and drink their nuclear margaritas, which I couldn't because I had to play that night. So I stayed on board and played a little on-line poker. When we set sail it was time to resume play in the tournament with the combined winners of the split day one. I drew table eight, seat nine, and who should be there but Gary "Benji" Lent in seat four. I didn't recognize anyone else but it didn't much matter as I got absolutely nothing to play. I was down to 19.500 at the break and soon thereafter we were all in the money for $5000 with 180 left. Benji got knocked out and I hung on to move up to the next cash level when it folded to me on the button with Jack-Ten suited. I raised and before the small blind could act, the little old lady in the big blind mucked her hand out of turn! Now the small blind could call with almost anything! I was furious but when he three-bet me I figured he had a real hand anyway. I called and the flop came Ten high. I put my last chips in and he called with Ace-Jack. I had been dominated before the flop but I caught my Ten on the flop to take the lead. But limit is about sucking and re-sucking and he hit the dreaded Ace on the river to knock me out in 111^th place, cashing for the second year in a row for about the same amount, $10,426.

All over but the cruising

For the rest of the cruise I played some cash games in the poker room and some on line. Some of the guys got off in Puerto Vallarta the next day, including Benji, but Zee and I wore out the palm of the Maitre D' at the gourmet room, eating there most of the rest of the trip for a modest $20/person extra charge. I ran into the tattooed stripper again once, at the poolside bar on deck nine. She jumped up and gave me a big hug, then tapped her temple with her finger and said, "I like intelligent men." I glanced over to see who she was sitting with, a grizzled drunk near 60 with a cigarette between his fingers burnt down so far as to be close to searing the flesh. "That's nice," I said, and excused myself with a frozen smile.  I didn't see Shana at all, which didn't surprise me as I think she's keeping a safe distance after the magical chemistry we had during the interview at the WPT Invitational. I was happy to get off and catch the next Alaska Airlines flight back to Seattle, where my Shortstack picked me up eagerly in the black T-Bird. I had only a brief rest before the next stop, Reno.

Now I'm Free…Freerollin': The 2004 Bay 101 PPT Event

Dog eat lion
I returned the Taurus to Avis and, after the obligatory argument about the tank being full even though the Taurus gas-gauge needle, which took about 10 minutes to recover from a fill, still read 7/8, hopped the next flight to San Jose, where I rented a lovely white Kia Splenda from Hertz and checked into my room at the Beverly Heritage Hotel. The hotel advertised free Internet but it was only free because it didn't work very well so I just used my Verizon 5220 card which worked fine here in the heart of Silicon Valley. I couldn't find anybody for dinner so I had a nice room-service meal and a little Grey Goose on ice.

The next morning I drove over to Bay 101 and got my video portrait taken in case I appeared on TV for this show. They had no food comps so I grabbed a tuna melt and some iced tea in the casino restaurant with Matt "Jacks Up" Matros, Mark Gregorich, and Andy "The Rock" Bloch. We chowed down on the final bites and they called for us to be seated but none of these had started close to on time so we weren't too worried. I drew table 14, seat eight. John Sutton, a local entry, was on my left in seat nine. In seat one was Jeri Thomas, one of the few women to have a World Series bracelet (Seven-Card Stud, 2000). I was happy and alarmed to see my friend Erick "E-Dog" Lindgren, one of the toughest no-limit players on the planet, in seat two. To his left in seat three was veteran Steve "Zee" Zolotow. In seat four was Card Player writer Allyn Jaffrey-Shulman, Barry's wife. In seat five was Phil "Unabomber" Laak. In seat six was an eccentric, long-haired guy with a thick middle-eastern accent with whom I had played with before but who had never wanted to give me his name. I finally got it out of him: Davood Mehrmand. Finally, on my right was the ubiquitous Men "The Master" Nguyen.

While we waited for the camera crews to mike up the featured table, I told the beautiful Allyn that she was the only human being on earth who could make "Shulman" sound like a waspy name. "Are you with the Newport Jaffrey-Shulmans?" I asked. She smiled and twinkled her eye. "No, the Laguna Beach Jaffrey-Shulmans." Nice place, Laguna Beach.

Finally the cards were in the air. Bay 101 had shuffle machines at all the tables, which I thought should be required for all high-stakes games and tournaments as it both eliminated some possibilities for cheating and allowed for more hands per hour. We started with 10,000 and I played a few small pots, down to 8000 or so, when I got involved in a pot with E-Dog. He made a small raise in early position and I called on the Big Blind with Ace-Seven of Spades. The flop Came Ace-King-Deuce. He milked me with small bets on every street and turned over a set of Deuces to take it down. Half my stack gone, E-Dog raised again in the same position and got calls from Zee, Men on the small blind, and me on the big blind with the same Ace-Seven of Spades. The flop came King-Queen-Four, two Spades. With the nut flush draw and an overcard I was looking to check-raise all in but Men bet out 600. I decided to call that and see what Erick and Zee would do. E-Dog made it 2000. Zee called and Men folded. I put Erick on a big King, Zee on a worse Flush draw, and Men on who knows what. I shoved in the rest of my chips, E-Dog immediately moved in, and Zee, who had less than me, called. When we turned the cards over, not only were we all on Flush draws but Men said he had one too! I of course had the best draw but Erick, unfortunately, did have the King, and with only three Spades and three Aces left in the deck it held up and Zee and I were out of the contest. I finished 141st out of 169.

I tore myself away from the Beverly Heritage and took the next flight out. Next stop: The PartyPoker Million cruise.